Huge Milestone for baby Finn! 24 weeks!



week 24..weight 140! Yikes! Have never seen that number on the scale before! Breathe!

                                    

I am putting my bitchy pregnancy rant aside today because I have been holding my breath waiting to hit 24 weeks! With the huge scare Zach and I had, 24 weeks was the magic number we have been waiting for! A 24 week fetus is considered viable and doctors would intervene to save him if he were born this early. While there is only a 50% chance that he would survive if born at 24 weeks, its better than nothing and puts my mind at ease! The rate of survival only increases after 24 weeks, so hang on little guy!

This past week wasnt so bad, but my energy is starting to fade. I think my weight gain is about to start stedying out to about a pound a week and the extra weight could be making me sleepy. I weighed in at 140 today.. giving me a 1 pound weight gain from last week and 6 pounds total! I have been DREADING seeing the scale hit 140. My body chose the best day to do it because not much can make me feel bad today knowing that I have hit the 24 week mark and Finley will be just fine!

I am in no way obsessing over gaining weight, I eat plenty and I am definitely eating bad foods..Mcdonalds cheeseburgers at least 3 times a week! I have just been slow to gain the weight I guess! Some of my favorite foods these days are bagels, chex cereal, and peanut butter and banana sandwhiches! I was never a big cereal person, but it has been my dinner many of nights lately! The milk helps soothe the awful acid reflux!

I am so excited to get back to my aerobics classes at the gym! I started back last week, but it took it so easy that it was almost like I wasnt there!! I plan to step it up just a bit this week and try to get back in shape for labor and post baby body!

My radius for personal space has greatly increased lately. I dont know what it is, maybe a protective instinct? But I cant stand anyone being too close to me, yet I feel like a magnet! I really noticed it in my aerobics class last week, I got there 10 minutes early to get a good spot in the back corner and was the second person there! I set up my things and had about 6 ft of space with my mat down between me and the next lady. Class starts and a girl comes in and flops her mat down between me and the other lady..she is literally 2 feet away..and the WHOLE room is open! I was fuming! It gets worse, a large african man comes in also late and puts his mat DIRECTLY in front of mine. Now I am blocked in and cant even see myself in the front mirror!! I just cant understand!! Only 5 people total showed up to the class and the class can easily cater to 30. Why on earth did everyone need to crowd me!? I am a human magnent!

The next odd thing is social anxiety..maybe it goes along with my personal space? I was at a shower for my cousin this weekend and the amount of people there made me very uncomfortable! I am typically a pretty social person and enjoy gatherings, but now that I am pregnant I feel very akward!! Maybe a mix of needing more personal space and my growing figure..I feel more like I am on display than part of the gathering. People only talk about the baby and want to touch you..its very weird for me! I wanted to curl up and run the other way! After I got a big plate of food, of course!

I cant wait to have this baby here and in our house! I am starting to get very anxious about it because I know 3 months will fly by and Ill officially be a mom!! I couldnt be happier to be bringing this sweet baby home and I already feel so close to him and such a bond..sounds crazy, but its true! I feel like I know him already and I am very attached to this little guy! Hurry up January!!!!

Happy 24 week pregnant lady today!

23 Weeks of torture



My bump! Getting big!
138.6 was my weight today..1 pound weight gain from last week and almost 5 pounds so far total!

                                          



Its Monday morning and I am officially 23 weeks. I am tired and a bit bitter about being pregnant these days. My stomach is starting to just ache a lot- I think they call it ligament pains! You kick me a lot now and I am often woken up from it! It was sweet at first, but its sort of getting old, dude!
I have started this new thing the last 3 days- waking up at 5 am! Its awful..so unlike me! Maybe its my bodies way of preparing for your arrival..who knows! I would like a say in this 5 am stuff, but no one seems to ask for my approval on functions regarding MY BODY anymore!!!!

I am tired lately and sooo thirsty all the time! Its just wonderful being thirsty and quenching my thirst with a huge Smart Water.. only to get the worst case of acid reflux known to man. I soothe my acid reflux with a cherry antacid softchew..which in turn, makes me bloated. Its fun! God, so fun!
My mood swings are in full force lately..maybe the lack of sleep? Or maybe its because I am growing a human!!!!! The UPS man came into our office this morning and asked me if I minded if he had a mint.. I gritted my teeth and said no, but I really wanted to tell him to GO FUCK HIMSELF. Crazy huh? over a mint..they arent my mints..why does it matter!!!! I know I am crazy, but I cant do anything about it. I am so crazy lately it actually humors me. I find myself dog cussing random drivers on the road for little things like not using a blinker..I havent used a blinker since I passed my driving test in 2003. Seriosuly. Stupid songs that come on the radio piss me off so bad that I sing them in this horrible mocking voice until I either punch the steering wheel or start crying out of annoyance. Seriously. "Remember all the things that you and I did first..now your doing them with her!!!" ahhhhh It makes my skin crawl. Everyone is getting on my nerves and I have no idea why. If they are breathing..it bothers me. Pregnancy at this point has become like a huge dose of PMS..and I am fucking OVER IT. Pregnancy should be treated as a disease.. a very contagious disease..I shouldnt be allowed out of the house and no one should be allowed near me!

On a brighter note, I had my 23 week doctor appointment on thursday..its kind of awesome being a high risk patient because I am catered to..no waiting around for hours..straight to business! Thats how I like my life. I got to see Finley since we do ultrasounds at every visit to check my cervix.. hes so freaking cute! His profile is already identical to Zachs! I cant wait to see this little God we have created in person!

I googled "newborn baby checklist" last week--BIG MISTAKE. I had no idea how much stuff a newborn needs. It was like 3 pages long. I panicked. I started obsessivley ordering all the stuff from the checklist off of nordstroms. New mom mistake, I guess. I paid about 4 times the amount for a bibb that one could pick up at Target. Oh well! Finley is already a bit stuck up..I feel like he is watching me from the womb. I have no problem with Traget..but I think he does. I have this ongoing scenario I play over and over in my head where I bring Finley home and hes like "Ok, your house..I can work with it..now show me to my room." I then so nervously show him his room and he is totally judgmental..inspecting everything.."Yes, oh yes thats great..organic linen..love that. wait what is that? you went to wal mart? No NO have that removed before I return back to my sleeping qurters." He is just very high maintenance and he judges me. Ill be ready though!

Along with ordering tons of probably useless items from Nordstrom, I have picked out his entire nursery and started ordering his things! My mom bought his beautiful bedding! I cant wait to have it finished..I am getting into serious nesting mode! Also, I find that buying things makes my mood better.. sorry, Zach! I have found that even talking about buying things has made my attitude better today already! So, I am off to shop! Gotta keep the pregnant lady happy!

                 

     Above is a picture of Finley at 23 weeks (22w4d) with his little profile identical to Zachs!! awkward picture of Zach, but it shows the profile! Love it! Zachs tiny little twin! Cant wait to buy matching outfits!!                 


                                                    

Week 22!

I got one full week of work under my belt since bed rest and I am feeling pretty great! The weather was absolutely beautiful this weekend.. it put me in such a great mood and helped fight these pregnancy blues! Zach and I went to church on Sunday and then ate Mexican food.. my choice! I just had to have some chips and queso! Afterwards, we decided to go do something outside and enjoy the beautiful weather! We would have went to play golf, but I am still on modified bed rest and really have to take it easy, so we opted to grab some pillows and a blanket and head to the reservoir for some fun! We decided to take the chihuahua with us so that he could get some exercise! That turned out to be a flop..the only exercise he got was crying at the other dogs out there! Either way, it wore him out and he didnt leave the couch all night!

This week I have gotten such a sweet tooth!! I am not sure where it has come from! After stuffing my face with Mexican food on Sunday, I spotted a Brewsters on the way to the reservoir. I made Zach stop.. yes MADE. He was either stopping or I was jumping out of the car! Originally I just wanted some mango sorbet. Unfortunately, the first thing I saw on the menu was a banana split. Yep, Ill take the banana split! It was bigger than my head! I proceeded to eat the entire thing. Zach didnt take a single bite. All I know is that if this continues.. we are going to have a BIG problem..the BIG being my ASS!!!

I was feeling Finley move so much over the weekend and it just seemed to stop on Sunday! Just when I started to worry, he started kicking! I almost wished he wouldnt have because his kicks are starting to hurt a bit! Some are so hard that they actually startle me!  I am able to feel when he turns now..I swear he does a full sommersolt! It is the strangest feeling.. Its almost like he gets stuck half way and pauses and then finishes his turn! It is really uncomfortable for me!

Finleys house is getting bigger, though I still havent gained much weight! 137.4 today.. so thats .2 pound weight gain from last week.. even after the banana split! But my bump does look bigger this week! I dont know why the scale isnt reflecting it yet because my belly is definitely growing and my pants are a bit snug! I can still button them, it just hurts!! Also, laying on my stomach has become uncomfortable.. which sucks because that is how I have slept for 25 years now!!!

This week I have become sooo clumsy! I have read pregnant women are more prone to being clumsy, but I just didnt think I would be one of them or that it would happen so soon! I picked up coffee from Mcdonalds Sunday morning and was opening the door to get out of the car and dropped the ENTIRE cup of SCORCHING hot coffee all over my lap. I dont think I have ever been more mad in my entire life! I now see why that lady sued Mcdonalds for her coffee being too hot.. because that mother fucker was on fire! My entire leg was red and puffy! In addition, I have been dropping things and tripping over dog bones..I have just gotten clumsy! and it really pisses me off!!!!!

I am sure the weight is about to pile on these next few weeks! Thats ok, I am just letting my body do what it wants to do in this time of my life!

We are about to begin getting Finleys nursery all set up! I have had the plans for months now, but it is time to start ordering things and getting ready for his arrival! Just 4 months left! ahhh!



Week 22 baby bump. Finger is where belly button is!

                                                  

Week 21!

After being on bed rest for two weeks, I am finally back at work. I really feel pretty good this week! My energy levels are way up and my nausea is rare. I am now dealing with some acid reflux! Yuck! It hurts and its annoying! It seems anything I drink that is NOT carbonated brings on the acid! Pre pregnancy I wasnt a big soft drink person..I mostly stuck to water, but now all I want is a coke with EVERY meal. I know its awful for me, but it keeps the acid at bay..so coke it is! At the beginning of this week I weighed 137.2..giving me a 3.2 pound weight gain! Its not much, but baby is healthy so its just fine!

I love being at this stage of pregnancy. I didnt think I would enjoy any part of it after what I went through in my first trimester.. most days I would have preferred being dead over pregnant! I finally have a tiny bump to show for all my misery! Its hardly noticeable, but I like the way it looks!! I have been feeling Finley kick since 17 weeks 5 days! It was such a strange feeling. At first I could only feel him around 9:00 every night. I waited for that time and loved feeling those tiny kicks before bed! Now that I am in my 21st week, his kicks have gotten harder and more frequent! He can be felt throughout the day, but I feel him best when I am laying flat and relaxing! of course!

I havent had any strong cravings yet, I am hoping that doesnt change! I have wanted something sweet after dinner occasionally, but who doesnt!?

I am so happy that my third trimester will be in the Fall/Winter. I walked back to work from my car yesterday and it was so hot and humid that I literally couldnt breathe.. I was mad and would have cussed anyone in my path at that point! Being hot while pregnant SUCKS! So I am quite happy to have our little Finley due in January!! January 14 that is!

21 week belly! finger is where belly button is! Bump can best be seen laying down flat!

                                   

A cerclage!?!?

I left work on Tuesday August 21 around 2:30 because my stomach was really hurting. The pain was much different than anything I have yet to experience during pregnancy. My stomach was tight (later found out that I was having little contractions) and I felt very crampy! It worried me enought that I followed my gut and  got checked out.

My regular doctor had just left so Dr Nichols saw me and ordered a sonogram just to be safe. She was totally shocked when the ultrasound tech confirmed my cervix was thinning and shortening!! I just know she thought I was some stupid first time pregnant woman who was paranoid about every little ache and pain! However, I had a serious problem! A shortening cervix is something that shouldnt happen until towards the end of your pregnancy.. 32 weeks plus! I was only 19 weeks so this was very scary news! My cervix was at a 2.3 and should be at least a 3..though a 4 is more average! With that, she sent me right over to labor and delivery where I would stay the next 2 and a half days!

I met with the high risk pregnancy doctor wednesday afternoon, Dr Perry. He was such a nice old man with a wonderful reputation! He did some tests and discovered my cervix had shortened more over night..I was now at a 2. Dr Perry recommended I have a cerclage, which is thick stiches put in the cervix to help hold the weight of the uterus. I listened to his advice and was scheduled for surgery at 3:30 the same day. My gut told me this is what needed to be done. My mother had 4 miscarriages before having my sister and I and without this very surgery, it is likely Natalie or myself wouldnt be here today! Zach and I didnt want to risk losing Finley if there was something that could be done!

I geared up for surgery. I wasnt nervous because I knew it was best for the baby. The anestheseologist gave me a spinal block.. which did not hurt AT ALL It was actually pretty cool! I couldnt feel a thing from my ribs down! My doctor came in and had my surgery done in 15 minutes! I was in and out in 30 minutes total! I was numb for about 3 hours.. I didnt care! I was starving from not being able to eat all day so Zach brought me Mcdonalds! After I got my cheeseburger, I passed smooth out. My doctor put me on strict bed rest for 2 weeks!

The idea of bed rest sounds awesome. BUT... actually being on bed rest sucks!!! I have never wanted to do laundry or dishes so bad in my entire life! Zach was a huge help! He waited on me and took care of my every need! Zachs grandparents sent a maid for us...Something I could really get used to! And then my sweet mom came for the week (hurricane Issac just happened to hit around the same time). She stocked my house with food and lots of deserts!!! I think she was trying to fatten me up!

My follow up appointment after the 2 weeks went great! I am now 21 weeks pregnant..as of yesterday and back at work!! I am on moderate bed rest.. I can work but still have to take it easy!  Finley had his big 20 week scan to check his developement and he is just perfect! all organs are right in place and the doctors say he looks great.. a bit on the big side, but great! At this point all that matters is him being healthy!

20 weeks 4 days and healthy!



Dreams

I needed to take a minute to jot some of my bizarre dreams down. Shortly after confirming you were a boy, the odd pregnancy dreams started. I awoke many nights sweating and very disturbed.

A recurring dream I have is that I am in labor and the nurses hand you to me and your my chihuahua, Jose. I am confused and its weird. I guess I have always thought of Jose as my baby so subconciously he is the only baby I know? Or maybe I really am some crazy chihuahua obsessed lady.. who knows! All I know is I dont like it!

The next thing I dream is that you are a baby, but you are sort of demonic. Its terrible, I know. I have to say first off that babies really do freak me out. Your fragile, helpless, whiny, and frankly just plain gross. But demonic? No I dont really think your demonic!! Thats a little harsh! However, in my dreams you are a new born baby who speaks like an adult.. a very creepy adult..which does come off a little demonic!!

My first dream was that baby Finley was born and the second he was in my arms he looked up at me, this precious blonde hair blue eyed baby, and said "Hello Mother" in a deep demon voice. I didnt like it. It creeped me out. I woke Zach up at 4 am and told him I wasnt so sure about this little person!! :)

My next odd dream had the same theme: demon baby. I faced my next greatest fear and was breastfeeding...Finley looked up at me, made the most awful face, spit the milk out and said "Bitch that milk is sour." I set him down and ran out of his nursery for Zach. I am not even going to try and make sense of that one.

Please start being more pleasant when you visit me in my dreams, Finley! Your creepy, but I love you!

Wednesday 9/26
Now that I am 24 weeks my demon dreams have stopped..probably because I am not really scared of you anymore.. I am very excited about you and very attached to you!
My dreams have taken a protective theme lately. I often dream that I accidently leave you alone in the house and I come home and Jose and Roe are all over you!!! I panic because it looks like Roe is smothering you, but she really is just trying to check you out and play.
I get frantic that I forgot I left you home and am trying to get home to you! It is a really scary feeling! I know I wont forget you in real life and if I do, surely the dogs will make great sitters!!

what are YOU!?

Finally 16 weeks pregnant!!!
I waited very impatiently to hit 16 weeks pregnant. I was dying to know what we were having! Zach and I both really wanted a boy.. me much more so than him. Now, I would have warmed up to the idea of having a girl, I just preferred you be a boy. My biggest fear about having a girl was raising a little me. I am high maintenance, bratty, stubborn and I always have to get my way! Always! I am the queen in my world and refuse to be demoted by another female in my own home!! (I know, I know..the second that baby girl would have been born my life would revolve around her..I just like to pretend it wouldnt!!!) While I have mellowed out a great deal with age and am not as hard to handle as I once was.. I still dont think the world needs another me. One is enough, just trust me on this one. But Zach? The world could use another Zach. He is so laid back, kind, patient and humble. and of course one hell of an athlete! My life would be very pleasant if our child was like my husband!

So back to my appointment, we went in on July 31. They agreed to do my scan at 16 weeks though they like to wait until 18-20. I just couldnt wait a day past 16 weeks. I am sorry, but I hate secrets and that  fetus was holding out on me and it wasnt fair. I was a nervous wreck all day. Our appointment was at 3:00 and the day just dragged on. I literally had a panic attack waiting in the room to have my sonogram done. Once in the room, the sonogram tech informed us that all but one of the sonograms she had done that day had been girls!! Great, I thought. The technician finally had you on the tv and I couldnt even look!! She asked if we were ready and I braced myself! She said BOY..you're having a BOY!!! I teared up with emotion and couldnt believe our luck! Zach and I high fived and headed out for a celebratory dinner! We would have our little man in a few more months! My life felt absolutely complete!

We announced your gender with the help of my trusted buddy and your big brother, Jose. He was quite the trooper being tied to 20 balloons! We also let facebook in on our little secret!

Jose helping to announce your gender!

                                                       

17 week baby bump! still weigh 134.

from the beginning!

    

Zach and I found out I was pregnant on Tuesday May 8. I took a pregnancy test that morning that came out positive! I proceeded to take 5 more.. which were all positive.VERY POSITIVE! Zach had already left for work so I did what any rational 24 year old newlywed would do.. I took a picture of the positive tests with a caption that read "WHAT DID YOU DO!!!!" Zach was a bit freaked out, but assured me everything would be just fine!! I then called my doctor and scheduled an appointment! I saw the doctor, with Zach by my side, the following tuesday..May 15 and she confirmed that we were, indeed, pregnant! After having a sonogram done at that same appointment the doctor estimated I was 5 weeks 1 day along! I couldnt believe that tiny little spec on the screen would be a baby in 9 months.. I actually didnt really even believe her! It just didnt seem real.
Zach and I heard the baby's heartbeat at my 7 week 1 day doctor appointment on May 29! Hearing the babies heartbeat made everything so real! The tiny spec actually looked like a very tiny human at this appointment. We were flooded with emotion..nervous, scared, excited, but definitely relieved to hear a heartbeat!

I stayed pretty sick from 8-12 weeks! I was so tired some days that I could barely keep my eyes open at work! Luckily for me, most of my nauseau hit at night so work was manageable! Thank you lord for phenegran!!!

I had one scare at 9 weeks. I was really sick the night before and ended up fainting at work from low blood sugar!! It was really scary! I experienced my first case of tunnell vision and 1 millionth case of confusion before passing out! Luckily for me, I had some wonderful co workers to take care of me. My friend, Kellye, even drove me home since Zach works a good 30 minutes away from me!

We announced our pregnancy to Zachs family at his family beach trip the weekend of June 16th..making me 10 weeks pregnant. His family had some mixed emotions about it at first.. after a few sarcastic comments about using birth control, everyone seemed to come around. That trip was no vacation for me. I was sick as a dog most of the time and the 2 minute walk to the beach everyday wore me out! I was a bit of a party pooper, but growing a human is tough work!!!! I spent the majority of the vacation laid out on the cool tile bathroom floor right next to the toilet!! Hopefully, next year I can socialize a bit more..or at least leave the bathroom!!!

My second trimester began in July! By about 14 weeks I was feeling pretty good! Although I had yet to gain a pound by that point! I started out at 134 before pregnancy (about 5 pounds bigger than I like to be..newlywed weight, as I was 125 at our wedding in december and like to stay between 125-130!!) My pregnancy weight  fluctuates between 133 and 136 but mostly stays put at 134! Hopefully I dont pack on the pounds at the end!!

Just when I thought everything was going smooth in my pregnancy..my naseau had subsided and my energy levels were peaking! My 20th week of pregnancy brought us new trials and tribulations..I knew it was too good to last!

Here is my first photo session! May 29. That makes me 7 weeks and 1 day!